♥ attrapemoisitum'aimes. |
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Justine 15/04/89 KPO district 10 cuscaden naive two fat men the burger restaurant norwegian wood the vow the lovely bones everything's illuminated extremely loud and incredibly close we bought a zoo american pie: the reunion beetlejuice an education the great gatsby TAKEitALLout!!
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Tuesday, August 31, 2010, an explanation to my lack of updates.. chilling with my favs. this is it. vertical limit. the reason why i am here... Thanks for everything. love you. Thanks for being the nuisance in my life i can never live without. my loves. what courage is.. thanks for the graduating bear my dear lucindaxiaozarbor & dinochua. loves. thanks for coming. really meant a lot. love you lots. Efourninety.thanks for showing me what love is. Thanks for being my light in the darkness. thanks for all the effort and energy put in. love you girls lots! ushering in the grads. thanks for always being there. for letting me be a part of each and everyone of your lives. for making all of this happen. love each and every one of you- irene,shu,jov,rhesa,yulin,julia,agnes,sam,bella,cyan,chu,chenee. now officially a graduate. what lies beneath... Thanks for always being there, in bad times and good times. thanks for tolerating me. thanks for everything. you're the best.. and i could never ask for more. love you. max and ben, thanks for being such great company for killing the loneliness and always there to lend a listening ear. thank you guys for making SOT so much enjoyable. love you guys! thanks for being there, for watching over me, for tolerating my constant whinings, for taking pics while im sleeping..and not tweeting it.haha. for keeping me awake during lessons. all the doodles and lame comments. thanks,love you! thanks for always being there, keeping me awake in the early mornings, the little encouragements, the never ending rubbish.. thanks for everything. love you! my favourite list... the beautiful 'monalisa' and the 'badromance' thanks for the HUGE surprise my elderly eraser. =) 3.5 hrs with my best. record not broken. but the sunrise was all worth it eh? thanks for being there, for the many outings, for bringing much fun into my sot life. thanks! love you!! thanks for making me feel not alone, especially in Kuching. for encouraging me with your never say die mugger attitude. i can never find a more hardcore mugger like you. thank God for you. love you! international pop star! team xiaolongbao @ thanksgiving. words can't describe how much love there is.. thanks all for the flowers..my room's really sunny these days. last of all, thank You for making everything happen. “Here we are, trapped in the amber of the moment. There is no why.” — Kurt Vonnegu ♥ 4:57 AM
Wednesday, August 25, 2010, 'I generally begin working on a story in total ignorance, which I think is the ideal starting point for me, because only if you are truly ignorant can you ask the truly ignorant question. But I have only the foggiest idea of what the story is when I get started on it. And in fact, every story that I write, when I'm doing my reporting, I always come upon some information that completely destroys my concept for the story. I think I know what the story is, and then I interview one more person, or I come across a document, or I see a video, or something, some piece of information that tells me, you know what, I'm wrong, I don't get this. The initial response that I have when that happens is 'Oh god, I'm screwed now. I've just wasted my time. I don't get this all. The story's gone all to hell. But on a few moments of reflection or sometimes waking up the next morning, inevitably, the realization is, 'Wait a minute. No, this story just got better.Because my understanding of it has deepened. I have a much broader and different take on what happened than I had before.-Mark Bowden on discovering narrative and the value of beginner's mind yes i've been showing that face a lot recently, maybe cause everyone's losing it. the surreal feeling's plaguing me a lot these days. sometimes i'll just wake up wondering if everything around me is real or is it just part of a dream. with SOT coming to an end, i guess certain adjustments need to be done. it's yet another new phase,a new beginning. where does it lead to? i have no idea YET. but i'm gonna trust You on this one. a crisis You gave me,a turning point i see. show me the radical decision i have to make. indeed we dont have to control our thoughts,we just have to stop our thoughts from controlling us. it's really difficult to focus on the right things, to move on to the next step when so many things are happening at the same time. it doesn't really help when everything matters either. i guess it's time to filter out the important ones and just focus on them. spreading of overheads never works when it comes to success. it's better to focus on a few and project excellence from it than to be able to contribute a little in each and everything that matters for that moment and do everything with a half heart. i hope a month is enough to clear everything up, to get back on track,to clean up the greys,draw the lines and follow the black and whites. to make a difference in each and every one of your lives, to really try out the gift of loyalty, to find back the enthusiasm that i unknowingly dropped on the way and to accomplish as much as i can with excellence. yes, with excellence. time for some self discipline and self control. four weeks,here i come. ♥ 1:47 AM
Tuesday, August 17, 2010, love happens; it is so incredibly messy. and people around you can’t comprehend why you do the things you do, or why you fight so hard for something that seems to cause you so much pain, because simply… they can’t see. they can’t see the invisible ring of insanity that surrounds you when you’re in love. it’s inconvenient and painful and devastating at times, but we can’t live without it. what you don’t learn is how hard love is. how much work it takes. how much of ourselves we have to put into it. how it isn’t worth it until we are complete and utter idiots about it. - littleteaspoon ♥ 11:21 PM
Monday, August 16, 2010, “So I’m going out there. And I’m going to do the best I can. People are going to get in my way. Things are going to bring me down. But I’m going to keep going. I’m going to reach as far as I can, for every thing I’ve ever wanted. And I’m not giving up. Because that’s what you do when your dreams are more important than your fears. You go out there and ignore the odds. You focus on one thing- that your dreams come true.” — K. Boulden defying the odds was something i always found hard to do. the fact that everything always falls into place didn't really help either. i guess that's why i always gave up halfway. afterall,accepting is always easier than fighting it. maybe the more i try to slack it away,to put it at the back of my head the more i try to compromise and tell myself "that's fine,the way it is,i just need to adjust my mindset accordingly", the more you are gonna take away from me. cause it was never your intention for me to compromise. as hard as it is, i'm going to trust you on this one. ♥ 2:28 AM
Saturday, August 14, 2010, “I think it happens to everyone as they grow up. You find out who you are and what you want, and then you realize that people you’ve known forever don’t see things the way you do. And so you keep the wonderful memories but find yourself moving on. It’s perfectly normal.” — Nicholas Sparks (True Believer) Stability.peace.assurance.security... i've come to realise,are certainly absent in my life. to think i took so long to realise. i guess the absence promised a life full of ups and downs,a life that's actually alive,something real and interesting. something that could keep me entertained and not tired of. but what happens when you start getting tired of the constant change in your life? i admit,the grass is always greener on the other side. the moment i get the peace,stability,assurance,security i want, i might be off looking for the thrill,the excitement i once had again. but sometimes, just sometimes,amidst all the chaos,a part of me just cant help but long for a shade to chill in and a trunk to lean on. something to fall back on during bad times selfish i know,but things that change often don't last. risks and assurance never coagulate. it's an either-or relationship. one that will make you or break you. i feel like i'm walking on water, and every step i take, i take with caution and courage that i sometimes take too long to muster. the fear of failing or coming to realise that it was all a wishful thought on my part, the people i might lose, the future that never lived out of the 4th dimension. where do i go from here? its "showhand" in a poker game now. ♥ 12:47 AM
, “Sometimes you have to be apart from people you love, but that doesn’t mean you love them any less. Sometimes it makes you love them even more.” — Nicholas Sparks (The Last Song) random thoughts' been lingering in my mind for the past few days, especially the many goodbyes,both sudden and expected, just that i didn't really have the time to materialize it in words. neither is it a good time now given the gargantuan-like amount of assignments waiting for me with outstretched hands. but oh well. thoughts left unexpressed just fades away overtime. i never understood the whole concept of goodbyes. the goodness in a goodbye or the whole rationale behind it. why let someone into your life when you know you have to say goodbye at the end. needless to say the pain undergone when it actually happens. what is the point of it all? goodbyes are like injections, it slowly implants itself into you and when you finally feel it, it's taken out within a split second leaving behind a hole and a whole lot of pain. i guess its the memory that really mattered out of it all. the whole idea of living the world instead of just visiting it. ♥ 3:35 PM
Monday, August 02, 2010, “Half of my heart’s got a grip on the situation; half of my heart takes time.” — John Mayer decided to take a break from the bible reading this few day's been a whirlwind. and i admit it's causing me to falter. the many perceptions that i had, decisions that i made, my priorities,all took a major turn. it's like the asteroids finally managed to tilt the earth a little more by a few degrees. i'm seeing a new perspective and almost everything seems so foreign and fresh. it's the season where all that happens seems so contradictory. Faith is not questioning why. and i'm fighting the urge to. seriously,the stakes are too high. guide me. ♥ 1:07 AM |